Madonna is one crazy mother
The Daily Mail is circulating a list of the Material Girl’s do’s and don’t issued to Guy Ritchie for his sons’ visit to London this week. The paper says they were sent by email from her PA. Here are a few of the wonders of parenting endorsed by Madonna:
- Under no circumstances should they read newspapers, magazines or watch TV (understandable since the family is current tabloid fodder, but wait…) or DVDs
- They must adhere at all times to a macrobiotic, vegetarian, organic diet with no processed or refined food (OK, I get the idea behind this, but every kid should get to eat chocolate. You have your whole adult life and declining metabolism to be healthy)
- All water they drink, even when it is to dilute organic juice, should be Kabbalah water (mountain water blessed by leaders of the Kabbalah religion)
- They should wear the clothes Madonna has sent with them on the flight. If they need to be bought anything, they should not contain man-made fibers
-Their hands should be regularly cleaned with disinfectant spray if they are in public places (this one is just wrong. First, kids get dirty, that’s what they do and second, that’s contributing to our super bacteria problem)
- Madonna should have phone contact with the boys as much as three or four times a day at times set by her (really, Madonna? Do you afford Guy the same rights?)
- At bedtime, Guy should read David the English Rose books Madonna wrote (oh, now you’ve done it, I think I’m going to throw up in my mouth a little).
Based on this, I say give Guy the kids just to save them from growing up bat-shit crazy.
If you enjoyed this post, please consider to leave a comment or subscribe to the feed and get future articles delivered to your feed reader.
I’m with ya, for pete’s sake let them be kids