Archive for August 2010

Gemma Arterton Exposes Her Bikini Body…..

…and I am not the least bit impressed. Considering that her image in “Clash of the Titans” and “Prince Of Persia” and British GQ made her out to look like a busty British babe, I was sorely disappointed when new photos of Gemma in her black bikini surfaced.

She and her husband were spotted snorkeling out on the shores of some lake in Italy. Unfortunately, there were no paleolithic piranhas in the lake to gnash that fugly husband of hers.

Let’s not mistake it, though, Gemma is quite the curvy girl and she definitely got herself a giant booty, but I cried after seeing that she didn’t have the big breastesses that I saw on the “Prince Of Persia” poster.

Metallica to release new Blu-Ray Exclusive!

Earlier in the summer, Metallica teamed up with fellow thrashers Slayer, Anthrax, and Megadeth (yes, with Dave Mustaine) and did a 4-in-1 concert that aired via satellite in selected theaters called “The Big 4″.

Well, the official Metallica website has announced that the “Big 4″ concert itself will make it’s home video debut on October 19th! The item is now available for pre-order on DVD and Blu-Ray, so get your order in before the Christmas rush!

Ashley Greene Amps Up the Skank Factor

Ashley Greene really can make a skanky whore outfit look really hot. Honey love was snapped on the set of her latest flick called “LOL” (which also stars another self-professed skank, Miley Cyrus) in Detroit earlier today wearing hot leather and high heels and…..other stuff.

So…..$5 sucky-sucky? Me love you long time?

Supermodels Playing Tennis

Sports Illustrated supermodel Bar Refaeli and Tennis. Nothing could sound more polar opposite than those two yet….it happened! Mrs. DiCaprio was at a Nike tennis event in New York yesterday where she teamed up with Rafael Nadal and put her less-than-stellar tennis skills to use.

One thing that was probably a given: she’s a sucky-ass tennis player. But I’m sure all the ESPN-HD cameras caught everything in spectacular slo-mo High Def.

The Top 10 Best Celebrity Booties

Are you someone that enjoys looking at celebrity booties? A fan of the butts? Do you like the Ass-tastic feeling of seeing your favorite female celebrities flaunting their backsides just for you? And is all you wanna do is zoom-zoom-zoom-zoom and a poom-poom?

Well, the folks over at MSN are big ass fans and they’ve compile their own list of the top female celebrity badonkadonks. Who took the top spot? Take a look below!

#10 JESSICA ALBA
#9 KATY PERRY
#8 SOFIA VERGARA
#7 RIHANNA
#6 SHAKIRA
#5 LADY GAGA
#4 JESSICA BIEL
#3 BEYONCE
#2 JENNIFER LOPEZ
#1 KIM KARDASHIAN

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Of course, it was a no-brainer for MSN to choose the big phat ghetto ass of Kim K. I mean, who else were they gonna choose, Amy Winehouse?

And since I brought it up, how about an ol’ skool music video classic about rumps!

Victoria’s Secret Invades Toronto

Did you know that the country/state/whatever of Canada does not have their own chain of Victoria’s Secret stores? I sure as Hell didn’t. Maybe it’s because I’m under the presumed assumption that Canada had the same chain stores that we do. Tells you what I know.

Check it out, earlier in the month the lingerie conglomerate opened a new store in Edmonton and, earlier this morning, they’ve gone and opened another one in Toronto. And on hand for the ribbon-cutting ceremony were none other than Erin Heatherton, Adriana Lima, and Chanel Iman (seriously with that name…).

I guarantee there will be some sort of VS inter-company party later tonight at a club and Erin Heatherton will probably wreck every guy there. FOR SURE!

New “Machete” Clip ft. Jessica Alba

Funny. Jessica Alba couldn’t make a convincing dancer in “Honey” nor a convincing super-hero in the Fantastic 4 movies nor a convincing animal trainer in “Good Luck Chuck” and now she’s playing ANOTHER unconvincing role in “Machete”

In the clip below, Jessica plays a law enforcement agent having a little chat with Michelle Rodriguez. Watch the clip and try not to laugh as Jessica tries to pull off the lines, “It’s the law” and “Can I get my tacos?”

Clip courtesy of IGN Movies.

The Beyonce Sideboob Hour

In today’s episode of “The Sideboob Hour”, we focus on everyone’s big booty babe, Beyonce Knowles! We’ve all seen her booty many times but now it’s about time she gave us some goddamned sideboob!

Beyonce and Jay-Z were spotted outside the beaches of Cannes and Big B was just flashing so much sideboob like nobody’s business.

Of course, Jay-Z didn’t seem to notice, but who the Hell cares! He wins and we win.

Kevin Federline – Still @ LARGE

The last I heard, the Popozao Master known as K-Fed was taking part in that Celebrity Fit Club show for VH1, but that was a year ago. But as you can see in the photo below (taken yesterday afternoon in Miami), K-Fed didn’t lose a SINGLE goddamned mutherfuckin’ pound!

But in K-Fed’s defense, it’s not as if Britney is doing any better. Either way, he’s FAT. Drink that slushie, you no good fatass BITCH!

Happy Birthday, Kobe Bryant AKA Mr. 5-Time Champion!

And I say that with pride as an LA Lakers fan! Today is the 32nd birthday of the 5-time NBA champion Kobe Bryant! That’s right, I said FIVE not ZERO like Lebron! Kobe has single-handedly bulldozed and earned his way into the NBA history books with a lot of fiery intensity and the heart of a champion. One more ring and he matches Michael Jordan!

Sure, there was that little tiff between Kobe and the Lakers organization back in ’07 but, in retrospect, had he not complained, the Lakers wouldn’t be the 2-time champions they are today, so SUCK IT, haters!

With a three-peat waiting in the wings and a solid new team (plus Phil Jackson returning) to back him up for the upcoming season, Kobe should get ready to polish his fingers for a SIXTH ring.

And let’s remember, Kobe won his 5 championships and MVP trophies without switching teams and not holding a one-hour ESPN special and not getting the cover of GQ Magazine. Just hard work and the will to WIN.

Supermodels Getting Sloppy Drunk

Other than Alessandra Ambrosio, there was no other Victoria’s Secret model that I knew of that would get so loopy and shit-faced wasted….until now, that is!

Yup, a photographer saw VS model Erin Heatherton at a trendy nightclub in Los Angeles sometime last week and got a photo of her getting wasted and shoving her tongue down some lucky dude’s throat! On top of that, she was going around sans panties!

Damn, this is one easy chick! Where’s Candice Swanepoel when you need her???

Rick Astley In Concert!

No, you haven’t been Rick-Rolled…..okay, so maybe you were, SUE ME. Late 80′s Pop singer Rick Astley made a concert appearance at a UK 80′s Festival (I would’ve killed to be there) where I’m sure he performed his two big #1 hits “Never Gonna Give You Up” and “Together Forever” for the large crowd of concert-goers (who actually camped overnight for this festival).

Let’s have an 80′s flashback, shall we?

Also on the concert bill were 80′s bands like Heaven 17, Kajagoogoo, Culture Club, and Curiosity Killed The Cat (now THAT is a really obscure 80′s reference). Had they been able to bring back Wham!, I definitely woulda flown my ass over there to attend.

Irina Shayk – Naughty & Naked in GQ

So let me get this straight, GQ Magazine decides to put Lebron “No Rings” James on their cover instead of smokin’ hot Sports Illustrated supermodel Irina Shayk? They pulled this kinda crap on Miranda Kerr and now they’re doing it for Irina? I’m decidedly shocked. That’s all I can say.

Check it out, Irina makes a two-page appearance in the September issue of GQ wearing lots of sheer clothing and no inhibitions. Apparently, her article is to confirm that she’s dating soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo but, let’s face it, that relationship ain’t gonna work. Hell to the NO! Anyway, enough from me, click on the scanned picture below and stare very, very closely.

And for the record, Irina Shayk is technically NOT a Victoria’s Secret model. She has modeled for a subsidiary brand for VS called Intimissimi (and a few VS bikini photos) but that’s as far as her VS career is concerned.

The Most Dangerous Celebrities on the Internet

The folks over at the Mcafee website have released a list of the “Most Dangerous Celebrities on the Internet”. By that title, it means that if you were to go online to any search engine and type in the names of these certain celebrities and click on the sites the list provides, the sites will most likely contain damaging executables such as Trojans, Malware, Adware, Spybots, spam, phishing software, Pop-ups and all that lovely shit.

The Mcafee people have listed the celebs with the most damaging “fansites” and here they are (in no particular order except for the #1 searched name):

–ANNA PAQUIN
–PENELOPE CRUZ
–HEIDI KLUM
–TOM CRUISE
–NICOLE KIDMAN
–JENNIFER LOVE HEWITT
ADRIANA LIMA
–BRAD PITT
–GISELE BUNDCHEN
–JESSICA BIEL
–JULIA ROBERTS

But the #1 Dangerous & Most Searched celebrity on this list belongs to none other than Cameron Diaz! Not Megan Fox or Kristen Stewart or Angelina Jolie – CAMERON DIAZ!! Of all people!!!

First of all, anybody in their right mind in 2010 that is wasting their time actively searching for photos and videos of Cameron “Piqued in 1994″ Diaz DESERVES to get their computer infested with PC-kiling viruses! You people SUCK!

Amber Heard shows support for the Gays & Lesbians

First of all, let’s not get too crazy and think that our Amber has gone bisexual on us (not that it’s a bad thing, mind you). Amber was out in Los Angeles (with her home-made protest sign) to show support for her friend, Tasya Van Ree, and to protest the twice-overturned Prop 8 Ban on Gay Marriage bill.

I’ll tell you what, I’ve got no problems supporting Amber and her social causes. But at least she coulda worn something a little bit skimpier than that, don’t you agree?

Ashley Tisdale & Kelly Brook Love getting High

Let’s make it clear that both Ashley Tisdale and Kelly Brook have absolutely NOTHING in common…..except for maybe a sense of wearing trendy t-shirts. Both ladies were spotted in different cities on the same day wearing the same t-shirt!

Kelly wore the white version of the “Love Makes Me High” shirt in Beverly Hills while Ashley wore the black version in Vancouver.

But let’s be honest, Kelly wins over Ashley because her giant boobies fill out the shirt.

GQ Magazine Does Not Endorse Champions

Someone over there at the GQ offices must really love supporting big-time LOSERS. For example, this month’s cover boy for GQ is none other than that two-timing, self-loathing, no championship-winning backstabber Lebron James. That’s right, no championship = GQ cover!

Y’know, if I recall correctly, I think it was Kobe Bryant and MY Los Angeles Lakers that won the 2010 NBA Championship and not the Cleveland Cavaliers. Oh, that’s right, the Lakers DID WIN! And did anyone from the team get the cover? NO, because GQ endorses losers! BTW, Lebron was also a GQ cover boy last year when the Cavaliers won the….oh wait, THEY LOST LAST YEAR AS WELL.

Let’s not forget that it was Lebron that CHOKED very badly the last two times he took the Cavaliers to the Eastern Conference Finals and then had the mind-blowing audacity to gloriously blow off his city in a bullshit one-hour ESPN special to go to Miami. And after all that….he still gets the cover of GQ! Not Kobe, not Pau Gasol, not Ron Artest, not Lamar Odom, not Derek Fisher, and not Phil Jackson because GOD FORBID the editors of GQ actually decide to stop kissing Lebron’s ass and finally put a REAL champion on their cover!

Let’s recap: Kobe = 5 Championships, Lebron = ZERO Championships. EPIC FAIL.

January Jones cast as The White Queen!

There had been lots of casting rumors throughout comic book circles about who was going to take the role of Emma Frost (AKA the White Queen) in the new “X-Men: First Class” reboot and now Entertainment Weekly has announced that “Mad Men” star, January Jones, has won the role!

If this news does turn out to be true, she beats out other rumored actress hopefuls like Amber Heard (NNnnooooo!!!) and Alice Eve. Oh, you BITCH!

Claire Danes Is….Hot?!!?

No way! I must be seeing things because the name of Claire Danes doesn’t exactly come to mind when you think of the words “hot celeb”. But I do have to admit, she was looking really good at the event she attended today. Holy shit, I must be outta my mind!

Claire was at the exhibition opening of “Life in Hi-Def Color” for a paint company (say what?) and she resembled a hottie for some reason.

Either that or maybe it’s the hot male models standing next to her. Yeah, that’s probably it.

Happy Birthday, Carl!

Today is the 58th birthday of actor Reginald VelJohnson. As everyone knows, Reginald is more widely known for playing the immortal TV role of Carl Winslow on the show “Family Matters”, which originally aired on Friday nights in the early 90′s on ABC as part of their “TGIF” line-up.

And just to refresh your movie trivia memory, Reginald also starred in two big hit movies in the late 80′s, “Die Hard” (he was the nightshift cop that answered John McClane’s call) and as the limo chauffeur in “Crocodile Dundee II”. Reginald has been scarce from the television ever since “Family Matters” went off-the-air but, damn it, Steve Urkel can kiss my ass!