Jessica Alba goes to Prison
Okay, that didn’t happen, but little Miss Personality-on-a-stick thought she was above the law and decided to go into a speeding frenzy in her GMC Yukon Hybrid car in Beverly Hills. Of course, the CHP pulled her ass over and gave her a little bit of a pep talk.
The unfortunate part? The sissy cop fell for her FAKE charms and let her off with only a Warning!!! What the blue fuck!!? Did he just wave his finger at her and say, “Okay, Miss Alba, don’t you be speeding next time or else! Now have a nice day.” SCREW YOU, MR. SISSY POLICEMAN SONOFABITCH!!
Not only should he have given her a goddamned speeding ticket, he shoulda hauled her ass to jail for lack of personality! GODDAMN IT ALL!!!!
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