Archive for I Hate You

Nadya Suleman wants to take on Kate Gosselin

sulemangosselinIn a fairly obvious case of the pot calling the kettle black, Octomom Nadya Suleman has slammed Kate Gosselin in a new video posted on RadarOnline.com.

“She needs to stop being so judgmental and stop pulling at straws for attention,” said Suleman says after watching an interview Gosselin gave on The Dr. Phil Show last February. Suleman herself is crazy as can be and sold her kids’ privacy for an unsold reality show last week. Of course, Kate did fire first criticizing Suleman’s welfare-funded, single parenting of 14 kids a few months ago.

Suleman rolls her eyes while accusing Gosselin of being “desperate for attention” and “over-emotional.”

“My children are extremely healthy, strong and happy. Don’t you have, like, a lot of issues in your life? A lot of marital problems?” she said.

“Why are you so desperate to glob on to my life? For attention?” added Suleman.

Honey, I hope you use that money for therapy because I can’t even begin to tell you how many, many, many things are wrong with you.

Octomom won’t help her mother out of foreclosure

octo-momThe only celebutard I hate more than Jon and Kate Gosselin at the moment is Octomom. It’s bad enough she’s got a reality show deal and somehow got a hold of more than half a million dollars to buy a new home, but she’s refusing to help her mother.

Nadya Suleman’s parents provided a home for their possibly mentally ill daughter for years and now that home was foreclosed on and auctioned off Monday.

OctoGrandma is $534,289.54 in the hole.

Suleman sold her children’s privacy story for a reality show last week. No network has bought in on her crazy story yet.

And here’s hoping no one will (sigh. They will. Hollywood is a sucker for a good car wreck).

Nadya Suleman signs on for reality show

Nadya Suleman Taking Her Children To The ParkAs if the dysfunctional antics of Jon and Kate Gosseling weren’t enough for TV viewers, another mom of multiples has inked a new reality deal.

The ever-annoying and super-irresponsible Nadya Suleman and her 14 kids will have their own series, according to her lawyer, Jeff Czech.

“(Nadya and the producers) are hoping to have an arrangement whereby several events in the children’s lives would be filmed in a documentary series,” Czech said. “One of the events in the children’s lives might be their first birthday.”

The show doesn’t have a name yet, but is designed as a “quasi-reality TV series” and Czech said that the production company, Eyeworks, was shopping the series to a network.

“They might be several shows aired during a year. There are all kinds of possibilities. It really depends on what the networks want,” her lawyer said. Of course, who knows whether anyone is considering what the kids want.

Czech refused to comment on how much Suleman will be making.

“Her television program will not be like the Jon and Kate Plus 8 show,” said Czech. “(Suleman) is looking forward to providing her side of the story.”

Sophie Monk hospitalized

monkAustralian pop star-turned-actress Sophie Monk headed to the hospital after a car accident in Hollywood on Thursday.

Monk’s Toyota Prius collided with another driver in an SUV, according to TMZ.com. The other driver appeared to be fine. Monk had no visible injuries, but was snapped being escorted away from the wreck by a fireman and paramedics.

Monk has several movies in the pipe, including “The Hills Run Red,” “Hard Breakers” and “Murder World.”

Holly Valance is bringing the bling

valancePlease be like the time I sent myself flowers on a really creepy crappy Valentine’s Day. Please.

Sometime-actress Holly Valance (real name Holly Rachel Vukadinovic. Yeah, good call honey) was spotted at London’s Heathrow airport with a big old rock on her finger. She and boyfriend (and man of my lust dreams) Alex O’Loughlin are supposedly on a time out. A. TIME. OUT.

But she was all walking-through-the-airport after her flight from Los Angeles, slurping on an orange juice. She didn’t answer questions from paparazzi about the ring, though fangirls online assure me it’s a costume piece she’s worn before. Please, fangirls, don’t fail me now.

Suleman wants the nickname she didn’t make up

nadya-sulemanShe didn’t think of the name nor did she do anything other than stupidly get pregnant with eight kids at once, but Nadya Suleman wants to control the name “Octomom.”

The mother of octuplets wants to trademark her nickname and filed two applications with the U.S. Patent and Trademark Office on April 10.

The applications state that Suleman wants to put the Octomom name on television programs, clothing and disposable and cloth diapers.

Suleman’s attorney, Jeff Czech, claims two people have approached him with suggestions for products and he wanted to protect the name. Czech says a Texas-based video game company also filed a trademark application for the name.

If, god forbid, she gets this, I will personally beat anyone who gives money to this leech on society.

Octomom’s reality show is a go

Octomom Nadya Suleman Visiting Her Kids At The HospitalI haven’t been subtle about it. I don’t like Octomom Nadya Suleman. It’s bad enough she popped out eight children without a plan, a partner, a job or any of the things that one ought to have when bringing home one baby, let alone eight.

The publicity whore actually has a reality show in the works. You know, the one that she wanted to do and Angels in Waiting had vetoed when offering their free services (and, gee, look, they got fired).

Apparently some network or online company has signed on to feed the monster that is Octomom. According to In Touch Weekly, who have an exclusive interview with Nadya Suleman in an upcoming issue, the OctoMom has worked out a deal that begins as soon as the eighth child of the set of octuplets is brought home.

According to Kim Serafin, senior editor at In Touch Weekly, who appeared on HLN’s “Issues,” Nadya Suleman’s reality show will chronicle the lives of the OctoMom and her 14 children.

And, apparently, there’s a relationship twist as they follow Suleman as she tries to find some sucker publicity whore to date. Serafin described it as a cross between “Jon & Kate Plus 8″ (except one of them has a full time job and the both of them have more sense in their little finger than this woman has in her entire life) and “The Bachelor.”

There is not enough annoyance in this world for that woman.

Miley Cyrus denies Obama girls

obamagirlsMiley Cyrus, I hate you. Seriously. Apparently the Obama girls, Malia, 10, and Sasha, 7, asked to see the new Hannah Montana movie but Cyrus won’t let them get a sneak peek.

Come on, you little Disney twit. Their father is the leader of the free world. Critics get a sneak peek and you won’t let the White House?

Miley confirmed that the first daughters asked to see the new movie a little early.

She said, “They want me to send them a copy, so we will – but, like everyone else, they have to wait ’til April 10th. Even the President.”

Honey, your music career has maybe a five year shelf life. Tops. You should probably suck up while you can.

Former octo-nanny fires back

sulemanOne of the fired nannies is firing back at Nadya Suleman. On Wednesday’s “The Dr. Phil Show,” one of the Angels in Waiting volunteers alleged the octuplets’ mom cared more about her own celebrity than the welfare of her children. Shocker.

“This woman does not care for these kids,” Linda West-Conforti said. “She is in (it) for the paparazzi, the media. That is my opinion. I’ve been there for a week. I’m the eyes, the ears and the mouth of these little children.”

According to West-Conforti, Suleman was often unreachable or out shopping. Octomom also showed no interest in learning how to care for her new batch of kids.

“Nadya only fed her babies … when a film crew was in her house,” West-Conforti said. “That’s the only time that woman ever volunteered to feed a child. And I tell you what happened: During one episode she was done feeding … she picked up the child (and) gave it to me on my chest. She didn’t burp it; she didn’t change the diaper; (she) walked out of that room and (we didn’t see) her for another 12 hours.”

But wait, there’s more.

West-Conforti also claims that the nannies Suleman hired pose potential health risks to her children.

“I was supposed to be there to train nannies, to train Nadya,” West-Conforti said on the show. “What I get is Hispanic-speaking ladies that are showing up, showing positive for TB.”

The Angels nanny said she saw what appeared to be a “a huge, raised induration” on the arm of one of Suleman’s private nannies, an sign that, according to West-Conforti, the woman had taken a skin test for tuberculosis and received a positive result. (A reaction to the skin test does not necessarily indicate the presence of active tuberculosis; further testing is usually required.)

Her attorney Jeff Czech denied all the allegations.

“Nadya is a very good mother and a very caring mother. The bottom line is the shoe just never fit,” he said of the short-lived arrangement with Angels in Waiting.

Octomom’s stripper days

suleman4

See, the porn push has promise! The National Enquirer claims that Octomom Nadya Suleman has been on the stripper stage.

According to the magazine, when she was 19, she shook her octopussy for cash and Suleman is afraid pics from those days might surface.

They quote an unnamed friend who says Suleman once told her: “I had not even kissed a boy. But I entered a dance/lingerie contest in a club near my home. I danced and paraded in lingerie. Then, when I was 19, I went to a gentleman’s club and performed as a topless dancer. But I only did it one night. I quit when I found out I was expected to perform lap dances on the customers.”

In other Octomom news, Suleman offered up this defense for her firing of the free Angels in Waiting staff to Dr. Phil: “The primary issue was that myself and my nannies felt extremely uncomfortable. I personally felt like a stranger in my own home. The goal was to empower me as a mother, help me, train me. I’m open to that, I want that, I want to do the very best for these…premature babies. I wanted (Angels) to use their training and knowledge to help guide me. I felt that was never accomplished. I felt as though every time I tried to hold the babies, feed the babies, they would be observing and they were waiting for me to make a mistake.”

Sigh. Someone needs to be watching her for mistakes. She made one pretty big one by have eight frickin babies at the same time, so it’s pretty possible she could use the watching.

Octomom nixes help and pornos

sulemanThis woman is going on my permanent list of people I hate. Octomom Nadya Suleman turned down free 24-hour child care from a nonprofit group called Angels in Waiting.

The angels offered this devil of a mother their nursing services, to help with her 14 children (all conceived with expensive IVF treatment for a single, unemployed mother). But the Associated Press reported this weekend that the group’s founder said that Suleman seemed to lose interest in their offer after they ruled out her request to do a reality show around her childrens’ care.

Angels in Waiting lawyer Gloria Allred said she filed a request for an investigation with Los Angeles County Child and Family Services into how Suleman will care for her children.

So, the unmarried, unemployed, about-to-lose-her-home Suleman, who’s receiving food stamps and other government assistance, is nixing the help because she can’t get fame and fortune out of the deal?

Suleman’s new spokesman, Victor Munoz, spoke with Dr. Phil McGraw on CNN’s “Larry King Live” show Friday night and claimed they were open to the offer, but more concerned with the impending release of the premature infants from Kaiser Permanente, the L.A. hospital where they’ve been since their birth in January. They may be released to the woman in about two weeks.

Suleman seems to have some boundaries. She turned down the $1 million and health insurance offered by porn company Vivid Entertainment to appear in a handful of X-rated movies.

“I think it’s kind of funny that I got offered $1 million to make porn,” Suleman told Radaronline.com . “Those guys at Vivid video must be nuts! Who wants to see me naked? Maybe in a year when the baby fat goes away,” she joked.

I’m not joking- do the porn. Or figure out a way to support your kids. Stop being a fame whore. Be a decent mother.

Julia Louis-Dreyfus gives the skinny on her workouts

PhotobucketI sort of hate it when stars act like they have it just as hard as the rest of us. If I could afford a personal chef and a trainer, I’d be a skinny bitch, too.

Actress Julia Louis-Dreyfus is on the cover of the April edition of “Shape” with killer abs, but claiming she struggles when it comes to maintaining her weight.

“I have to work at not being fat,” Louis-Dreyfus said. “I’m always trying different things to see what sticks.”

Among her workouts are running for four miles at a park or hopping on the elliptical at home. “The New Adventures of Old Christine” star said finding balance between her indulgences, like chocolate and her biggest food vice, bacon, and discipline helps her stay slim and sane.

“I feel like I deserve a treat when I work hard,” said Louis-Dreyfus. “It’s important to give yourself a little of what you really want so you don’t feel like you’re in food prison.”

Kristen Stewart denies costar hookup (again)

Don’t worry, Natalie Portman, Kristen Stewart is quashing rumors of a hook up with costar Robert Pattinson in a cover interview with Nylon Magazine and generally making herself sound as petulant and snobbish as possible.

She admits that the press part of the job isn’t her favorite and it’s not something she’s good at (yes, Kristen, we’ve noticed).

“I feel like I have nothing to say on those shows (like Letterman),” Stewart said, referencing her memorable appearance last year. “I’m not good at the funny thing. Most people are really great on those shows. I don’t have a contrived personality that (I can) just pump out (for) a five-minute segment, so I end up sitting there and looking kind of baffled. Embarrassing.”

Of the insanity of Twifans and general Twilight madness, she said, “Anywhere we’d go for Twilight was a psychotic situation. The sound was deafening, and it’s thoughtless, as well … You get a slew of all these bullshit questions like, ‘What’s it like to kiss a vampire?’ and ‘How much do you love Robert?’ Then you’ll get one that’s actually real, but you’re like, ‘No, I can’t right now, I can’t even consider (it).”

Yes, Ms. Stewart, you’ve established how above it all you are. Congratulations that you are too good to speak to people in public or do your contractually obligated grunt work on the press lines.

But she does say one good thing. She and Pattinson are definitely not an item.

“It’s just totally false … Rob and I are good friends. We went through a lot together, so we feel very close. But if we go out in public, every little detail is scrutinized, like the way I stand next to him. And it’s like, I know this guy really fucking well (laughs). It’s only natural that we’re sort of leaning on each other, because we’re put in the most fucking psychotic situations.”

Kate Moss grows boobs and is afraid

I hate Kate Moss. Seriously. I’m going to go all Martha Stewart on her and sew her mouth shut. Her only talent is as a mobile clothes hanger and she manages to be a total waste of space the rest of the time.

The supermodel’s teeny tiny frame featured an extra few pounds and set off pregnancy rumors last weekend in London when her stomach bulged slightly as a result. I suspect she hasn’t ovulated in ages anyway.

Moss claims gained some weight “in the right place”.

She said: “I am a woman now. It’s true. Honestly, I’ve never worn a bra in my life. Ever! It’s so awful, even my friends are phoning me up and saying, ‘Are you pregnant?’

“And I’m like, ‘No! I just put on a couple of pounds and they went in the right place.’ Isn’t that weird?”

Just in time to launch a lingerie line for British high street Topshop – claims she can now “fill a B-cup” and is wearing bras for the first time.

She adds: “I’ve just started wearing bras. It’s a miracle. Great timing for my lingerie collection. I’ve just grown breasts.”

See, Kate, for most girls that timing is around, oh, say, 12, 13, you know – puberty.

But Moss is afraid her boyfriend Jamie Hince of the Kills might not be happy with her new curves.

“My boyfriend might not like them. I’m a bit worried”.

Now, that’s mostly sad. Honey, breasts are lovely and fantastic. I’ve got them and have heard no complaints to date. Boys (and girls who swing that way), don’t you agree?

Reason #128 Why I Hate Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt

“The Hills” needs flattened, if only for giving the world publicity whores Spencer Pratt and Heidi Montag. The two spent the fall staging a fake wedding in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico – with lots of drama, but without an actual marriage license provided.

Star! now reports that Pratt is planning a messy divorce to end their imaginary marriage.

“Spencer is masterminding the whole thing right now,” says a source. “He’ll make sure people see him going in and out of a lawyer’s office. Then he’ll stage fake fights with Heidi for the cameras and talk on the show about getting married too young and pretend he’s really conflicted.”

“Spencer will push this as far as he can, but it will all be 100 percent fake. He loves Heidi and will never let her go,” says the source, who adds, “They’re just always looking for a way to out-drama Lauren Conrad. It’s their No. 1 goal in life!”