Mega-UHQ Scans
Minka Kelly – Sexiest Woman Alive 2010
In last May’s issue of Esquire, the editors picked Christina Hendricks as America’s “Best-Looking Woman”. And now the Esquire editors have chosen their “Sexiest Woman Alive 2010″ and the honor goes to Minka Kelly!
That’s right, the “Friday Night Lights” starlet who practically hasn’t starred in any movies in recent months, hasn’t been in many tabloid stories, or even made the Top 10 in this year’s Maxim’s Hot 100 list triumphed over other news-making Hotties. When you think about it, names like Kim Kardashian, Scarlett Johansson, Megan Fox, Adriana Lima, Brooklyn Decker, etc. were far more relevant in the last twelve months than Minka but now that I assess it……I really don’t have any problem with it at all! Good for you, Minka!
Click on the pictures to view the bigger versions!
The issue doesn’t have much to say about Minka that we don’t already know (although she claims to clean her own toilet), but I will agree with one thing that the article states quite clearly: “She still feels like she hasn’t done anything yet“.
Minka’s photos feature her in just her underwear (courtesy of Emporio Armani) and I never really noticed it but, boy, does this girl have a BIG ass! The issue also has a special two-page foldout of Minka in more underwear, so be sure to check that out!
Maxim Cover Girl November 2010
Just when I was starting to think Maxim was picking up steam after last month’s sexy Anna Kournikova cover story, they dig down into the stanky-ass trenches and come up with November’s issue. Yup, for the November issue they use Avril Lavigne to quell men’s thoughts of sexy ladies.
I mean, who else in Hollywood emits utter sexiness and uninhibited desire and lustful fantasies filled with hot sex and loud moaning? Surely not Avril Lavigne! WHAT ARE THEY THINKING?!?
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Inside the issue, Avril tries her damnedest to show off some cleavage and curves (which she OBVIOUSLY doesn’t have). It’s nothing but EPIC FAIL! In comparison, the issue also has a pictorial featuring newbie actress Taylor Cole (from NBC’s “The Event), who is WAY hotter than Avril and has beautiful curves as well as a nice pair of boobies……but Maxim decided to go with Avril. Maxim November 2010 = EPIC FAIL.
Maxim Cover Girl October 2010 [in 3D]
Now that Maxim has decided to get off the Lindsay Lohan deathtrap from last month, their new cover girl for October is tennis superstar Anna Kournikova! If I’m correct with my (non-existent) tennis knowledge, I think Anna is currently competing in the U.S. Open in New York. Whether she’s doing well, I could care less. Seriously.
Click on the scan to view the bigger version!
Anyway, let’s ignore the boring article and let’s focus on the fact that Maxim has decided to publish Anna’s sexy edit in a headache-inducing 3D! That’s right, the issue provides you with those cheapo red-and-blue paper glasses and when you open up to page 64 of the issue, you get to see Anna and her heaving cleavage sort of stick out at you. You’ll need to stare past the crappy red-and-blue tint to see the magic and it almost works! If only they had done this with Kelly Brook’s edit from LAST month, it woulda been better.
The “Mad Men” Ladies Get A Rolling Stone Cover
Okay, let me figure this out. So you’ve got Elizabeth Moss, January Jones, and Christina Hendricks all on one cover exposing lots of cleavage in the latest issue of Rolling Stone magazine…..and there’s no additional pictures of ANY of them inside the issue?!? What kind o’ ass-backwards and country hillbilly bullshit is this??! Someone needs to get FIRED. I expected this crap from GQ but NOT Rolling Stone!
Click on the scan to view the bigger version.
The issue shows a bunch of behind-the-scenes photos of the filming of “Mad Men” and BLAH BLAH BLAH like we care! I want to see more of Christina Hendricks and those giant knick-knockers! I don’t care how many hours she sits in the make-up chair before filming!! EPIC FAIL!!!
Irina Shayk – Naughty & Naked in GQ
So let me get this straight, GQ Magazine decides to put Lebron “No Rings” James on their cover instead of smokin’ hot Sports Illustrated supermodel Irina Shayk? They pulled this kinda crap on Miranda Kerr and now they’re doing it for Irina? I’m decidedly shocked. That’s all I can say.
Check it out, Irina makes a two-page appearance in the September issue of GQ wearing lots of sheer clothing and no inhibitions. Apparently, her article is to confirm that she’s dating soccer star Cristiano Ronaldo but, let’s face it, that relationship ain’t gonna work. Hell to the NO! Anyway, enough from me, click on the scanned picture below and stare very, very closely.
And for the record, Irina Shayk is technically NOT a Victoria’s Secret model. She has modeled for a subsidiary brand for VS called Intimissimi (and a few VS bikini photos) but that’s as far as her VS career is concerned.
Maxim Cover Girl September 2010
I can’t tell if this is a step UP or a step waaaay DOWN for Maxim because their cover girl for September is none other than everyone’s favorite homicidal jailbait whore, Lindsay Lohan! I’ve looked through her editorial and it seems these pictures were taken a long time ago. Not surprising considering that Lilo looks way too healthy in the photos and we sure as Hell know that ain’t the case.
Click on the scan to view the bigger version!
Either way, Maxim wins, we lose because we don’t get any nipple and no firecrotch shots (unlike other magazines she’s shot for). Damn, that reminds me, Kelly Brook is on the cover of the latest issue of Playboy! Hold on, I’ll find a copy and be back in a sec…..
Maxim Cover Girl August 2010
For the last eight months, Maxim has had an up-and-down streak in terms of cover girls and for the month of August, it’s more of an in-betweener. The August cover girl is none other than “Heroes” and “Entourage” starlet Dania Ramirez.
Click on the pic to view the bigger version.
I’m not quite a fan of Dania considering that I hated her character in “Heroes”, but she is a purdy little Dominican girl, so I guess she’s a’ight. But if there’s one thing I’ve noticed about this girl, it’s that she does love to shove her boobies up really high (giving the illusion that they’re “big”), that much I noticed in her photos.
Considering the competition that Maxim had, I am also a bit disappointed because inside the issue is an additional editorial featuring none other than UK bombshell Kelly Brook!!! In her edit, Kelly does a sexy photoshoot in the desert with a motorcycle and only her jacket to cover up her giant boobs. Of course, since this is a goddamned left-winged Republican country, Maxim won’t publish any topless photos of Kelly (which I am absolutely sure were taken) in the issue.
This issue is half WIN and half EPIC FAIL.
Maxim Cover Girl July 2010
In a big surprising move by the editors of Maxim, the cover girl for July 2010 is NOT Katy Perry! Instead, the cover girl is “Dancing With The Stars” champ (and Pussycat Doll) Nicole Scherzinger.
The reason I say it’s “surprising” is because the tradition was that whoever Maxim chose as their #1 pick for the Hot 100 list, that girl automatically scored the cover for the following month. It happened with Marisa Miller in ’08 and Olivia Wilde in ’09, but not for Katy for ’10, apparently. Anyway, since Nicole is the cover girl, let’s talk about her.
Click on the pic to view the bigger version!
In the article, Nicole doesn’t talk about a goddamned single interesting thing, so let’s flip the switch and talk about Nicole’s past (which I’m sure she’d like to forget). Back in early 2001, Nicole participated in a reality show called “Popstars” on the long-defunct WB Network. Along with four other lucky ladies, Nicole won a coveted spot to join a reality show-created group called Eden’s Crush. The group’s first single, “Get Over Yourself”, charted at #1 on the Billboard singles charts but with the dismal sales of the group’s full length album and their record label going under, the group broke up six months later without ever releasing their second single.
Check out the video of Nicole’s early work with Eden’s Crush!
How do I know all this useless information, you ask? Simple. That’s because I was there when it happened. AND…I have the photos to prove it! And, BTW, what ever happened to Nicole’s bandmates from Eden’s Crush? There was a member named Maile Misajon who was probably the most exotic beauty of the group. Hmm, I guess we’ll never know.
Katie Cassidy Reveals Her Bikini Body
“Melrose Place” cutie Katie Cassidy appears in two pages of the June 2010 issue of Shape Magazine. In the pages, Katie shows off her airtight curves in homages to Farrah Fawcett and Brigitte Bardot.
Click on the scan to view the bigger version!
As much as I love Katie and her infectious blonde beauty, it does kill me inside to see how the top half of her body is just not akin to the rest of her curves. In case you didn’t notice it, homegirl is ridiculously flat-chested to the point where she looks like a guy! But I try not to let it bother me. Unlike fugsters like Ashley Tisdale or Jessica Szohr, Katie’s beauty far outweighs her boobies. WE LOVE YOU, KATIE!
Maxim’s Hot 100 Of 2010
Ready for the Maxim Top 100 list of 2010? You better be because this year’s #1 girl completely blindsides everyone to take the top spot from last year’s winner. Last year’s #1 girl (Olivia Wilde) takes a massive dive down the charts and lands in the 20TH SPOT! As with most lists of this caliber, I have my agreements and disagreements but let’s at least be thankful that Kristen Stewart is NOT in this list!
Enough from me, here’s the complete list of Maxim’s Hot 100. Scans for the Top 10 ladies will be posted below. To see if your favorite girl made it onto the list, click on the “CLICK HERE FOR MORE” link below for the rest of the list!
#10: MARISA MILLER
#9: KIM KARDASHIAN
#8: OLIVIA MUNN
#7: ELISABETTA CANALIS
#6: RIHANNA
#5: MEGAN FOX
#4: BLAKE LIVELY
#3: ZOE SALDANA
#2: BROOKLYN DECKER
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And the NUMBER 1 Hottest Woman of 2010 according to Maxim is……
#1: KATY PERRY!!!
And that is your Top 10! Click on the link below to see the other 90 ladies and see where you favorite girl ranked this year!
CLICK HERE FORE THE REST OF THE LIST!
Ashley Greene – The Face Of The Future
“Eclipse” starlet, Ashley Greene, has been chosen as one of the “55 Faces of the Future” by Nylon Magazine alongside Vanessa Hudgens, Emma Stone, and Brooklyn Decker (among others). In the article, Ashley recalls her life previous to being cast in “Twilight”, claiming that she was barely making ends meet financially and was auditioning for non-speaking roles to the point where she nearly quit.
“I was 17, and I convinced my parents to let me graduate early. My mom helped me set up an apartment in Glendale [California]. Then I moved to Hollywood and hated it, so I moved to the [San Fernando] Valley. I love it there.”
And now that “Twilight” has made Ashley into an international vampire seductress, it doesn’t seem like she has to worry about making the rent anymore.
“I am a big believer that everything happens for a reason”, she says. “You have to work your butt off, but if it’s supposed to happen, it will. I’ve been very lucky, in the sense that everything has fallen into place at the right time.”
EDITOR’S NOTE: Hey, I used to live in Glendale and I NEVER saw anyone as good-looking as Ashley there! WTF, man!!!
Christina Hendricks – Best-Looking Woman In America – PART 2
I think it’s only fair that I also post the other photo of Christina that is inside the Esquire issue. Believe it or not, there is only ONE other photo and in it, she’s eating a juicy watermelon with those plump peckers. Watermelons, GET IT?!?
Also, here is Christina’s article entitled, “A Letter To Men”, typed verbatim as it appears in the issue. Take from it what you will.
>We love your body. If we’re in love with you, we love your body. Your potbelly, everything. Even if you’re insecure about something, we love your body. You feel like you’re not this or that? We love your body. We embrace everything. Because it’s you.
Speaking of your body, you don’t understand the power of your own smell. Any woman who is currently with a man is with him partly she loves the way he smells. And if we haven’t smelled you for a day or two and then we suddenly are within inches of you, we swoon. We get light-headed. It’s intoxicating. It’s heady.
>We remember forever what you say about the bodies of other women. When you mention in passing that a certain woman is attractive–could be someone in the office, a woman on the street, a celebrity, any woman in the world, really–your comment goes into a steel box and it stays there forever. We will file the comment under “Women He Finds Attractive.” It’s not about whether or not we approve of the comment. It’s about learning what you think is sexy and how we might be able to convey it. It’s about keeping our man by knowing what he likes.
>We also remember everything you say about our bodies, be it good or bad. Doesn’t matter if it’s a compliment. Could be just a comment. Those things you say are stored away in the steel box, and we remember those things verbatim. We remember what you were wearing and the street corner you were standing on when you said it.
Click here to read the rest of Christina’s letter!
Christina Hendricks – Best-Looking Woman In America
The radiant red-haired bombshell from the TV show, “Mad Men”, with the insanely massive knockers is the May 2010 cover girl for Esquire Magazine. In the issue, the magazine took a survey comprised of over 10,000 women and asked them various questions from Politics to sexuality. For the choice of “Best-Looking Woman In America”, over 30% of the vote went to Christina Hendricks (hence the cover)! The other 17% of the “Best-Looking Woman” votes went to Adriana Lima (who is NOT American, mind you) and 14% went to Megan Fox.
In the article, Christina gives out her own personal notes on how to treat a woman. ["No man should be on Facebook" is one of her pieces of advice.]
Also, another question that was asked in the survey was, “If you are/were a lesbian, which of these women would you most want to sleep with?” A whopping 31% of the votes went to actress Zooey Deschanel followed by 20% for Megan Fox and 14% for Adriana Lima. Really? Lesbos prefer Zooey over Megan Fox?
Maxim Cover Girl May 2010
Maxim continues it’s hot streak of beautiful babes and the latest girl to join in on the fun is UFC’s “Octagon Girl”, Arianny Celeste! I don’t know much about this girl but she’s packin’ some big hoots! That’s all the reason I need.
I’ve read her interview and she claims that she’s been a gymnast her whole life and sees herself as “quite flexible”. Oh, and she also claims that she loves computer nerds. Well, I guess I’m outta the question, then, so SCREW YOU.
Click on the pic to view the bigger version.
BTW, what’s with the growing trend of Maxim using covers that have overblown nuclear outdoor brightness? It’s really beginning to bug me. Why can’t they just stick to hot girls in swimming pools or fancy-shmancy bedrooms?
Gemma Arterton Doesn’t Care What You Think!
British actress and “Clash Of The Titans” starlet, Gemma Arterton, has a big editorial in the April 2010 issue of GQ UK and in the article, she goes on quite a rant about not liking being part of the movie “system”. She goes on record saying that she finds being “made up” for Red Carpet events to be “utterly boring” and “doesn’t give a fuck about all that”.
The article goes on to say that Gemma has zero problems with movie nudity. Her next flick (called “The Disappearance Of Alice Creed”) features the actress bound, gagged and stripped naked for most of the film. “I’ve always been known for going for things. I’m quite passionate. Quite fiery. It doesn’t concern me at all”. TAKE A HINT, Megan Fox and Jessica Alba! And the actress says that if she doesn’t get along with a co-star, she won’t talk smack about them but she won’t pretend that she likes them, either. “There are people I’ve worked with who I’ve not particularly got on with but you have to be nice about them. I hate it, but it’s about protecting yourself”.
Y’know, for an actress like her that only has ONE high profile movie under her belt so far, Gemma’s already got a Megan Fox shit-talkin’ attitude about her own fame. Don’t get too full of yourself, little missy! All the chubby-girl nudity in your movies won’t save you from obscurity. We’ll be the judges of your career!
Maxim Cover Girl April 2010
After three months of having to endure a bunch of average-looking cover girls, Maxim is finally starting to pick up the temperature meter! Maxim’s cover girl for April 2010 is relative newcomer actress Alice Eve, who stars in the new movie, “She’s Out Of My League”.
I haven’t read the article yet but her pictures in the issue are definitely quite boneriffic and delicious. And…let’s not dismiss the fact that Alice is MUCH hotter than last month’s hideously drab cover girl, Kaley Cuoco! Click on the pic below to view the bigger version.
Would it surprise you that this girl is also British? In a recent press junket interview, Alice claimed that she grew up in both the UK and in Southern California, so she can easily switch between accents on the fly. Now THIS is my kinda girl!
Maxim Cover Girl March 2010
Whoever is in charge at Maxim should get his/her ass FIRED. The March 2010 cover girl is none other than the ultra-foul patch of piss known as Kaley Cuoco.
Let me make it PERFECTLY clear – Kaley Cuoco is NOT hot. Kaley Cuoco is NOT sexy. Kaley Cuoco does NOT get hearts pumping or boners raging!
If THAT is what Maxim considers hot then they should just KILL THEMSELVES. So far, Maxim’s 2010 cover girl track record has been absolutely terrible and this just adds on to the shit pile!
GO STRAIGHT TO HELL, MAXIM MAGAZINE!
Wet & Wild With Ashley Greene
As I reported last month, Ashley was chosen as the new face for Sobe Lifewater. Her advertisements just made their debut in the 2010 Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue and, inside, she’s literally got NOTHING on (except for some clever bodypaint).
Click on the pic for the bigger version!
And if you look REALLY closely, you WILL see what you think it is! Now that’s advertising for ya!
Katie Cassidy’s Photoshopped Cleavage
“Melrose Place” cutie, Katie Cassidy, is featured in a sexy little 6-page editorial in the March 2010 issue of Cosmo and only three words can describe her: Dee-Lish-Us! I hate to point it out, but Katie is one of the few pretty Hollywood starlets that come from the I.B.T.C. and the picture below does her a great injustice!
The photographer snapped the photo and then tried to add “cleavage” by Photoshopping a giant speck of dirt in between her breastesses and it is just the most heinous thing I’ve seen!
Click on the pic to see what I mean…
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She’s perfect the way she is, so leave her be, Mr. Photographer and Cosmo editor!
Jennifer And Jessica Are Friends (?)
Jennifer Garner and Jessica Biel are on the cover of the March 2010 issue of Marie Claire. Both girls are all lovey-dovey and kissy-kissy in the editorial but not enough for my taste. In the article, they discuss about some movie they did together….I don’t know, LIKE I CARE.
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They almost make a convincing pair of BFF’s, don’t they?
